Today is my day off. I should be productive and do something besides go tanning but i just cant seem to get it together today.
I am so tired, and I think its from not eating.
Jan
27
“When did the world get so fucked?”
I feel bad for the youth of today. I really do.
I wonder if they will ever get to see what I have seen. I hope they do, Minus the pain and heartache.
Jul
20
I was never good at titles.
Well, i said i was gonna write in this again. So, here i am.
I have a million things to do for school this week. Write an 8 page paper, revise another, make a presentation. But you know what? the semster is almost over. And I think I am getting all A’s. not too bad. Feels good.
I went and saw Trina today. She just got out of the hospital. God bless that girl. I love her so much. I have never had someone understand me so much. Ever. In my life. She knows what I am thinking before I even have a chance to think it. We had a good talk about life today. About how were 25. And something has triggered us. We are not quite sure. Hormones? But the one thing is…time is ticking away. Life is short. And we have a lot to do. Its time to do me for a while.
K, Im done for tonight. I dont care to write about anything else tonight and I have to wake up early in the morning.
Jul
18
After 11 months. And one day. It is over.
Tomorrow, I will start using this again.
Apr
07
dude, i suck at blogs.
I have been doing this thing with my hair where i like it curly! its crazzy looking but i like it! its a good thing to have long hair and it be summer and be able to do that = less time with the blow dryer. i hate that thing.
i am going back to school in the summer! first class starts may 10!full semester! 12 credit hours, FML but i wanna get this shit over with already and with having a restricted license until 9/26 this gives me a reason to drive! So, the classes…
Economics, composition (English) which is online! YES!, American government, and psychology! sounds pretty bad but i think i will be okay! actually, i juts remembered my counselor lady told me i should take a math class, opps. i hate math.
i go to court on 4/14 for sentencing. LAST COURT DATE! almost 6 months later which is good because i knew i was going to loose my license (which i did for 30 days) so this juts kinda prolonged the inevitable. I get my restricted license on 4/29 after i pay $125 to reinstate it. Fine, i dont care, but i get to put the shame card, as i call it away get get my drivers license back. Im hoping i dont get slammed with probation like up the ass. 6 months non-reporting? its a long shot… but that is what i am hoping for and i dont wanna do community service, that would be so bad.
I need a second job, badly. i wanna do something sweet. and something that pays good. FUCK! get me out of this state. PLEASE! i hate it here.
Got my taxes back! yea!! like $1,300…SO SAD that it all has to pay for the epic failure of 09. FML, we live we learn.
im going to CA with MIKE! and i am so excited to see him. this means so much for the both of us and i know that once this happens the entire dynamic of our relationship is going to change. sometimes we fight over the stupidest things and it takes it toll on us both, not to mention the distance, as if that was not bad enough. I love that boy, i can see myself getting married to that boy, i can see myself loving this boy for the rest of my life. Im excited to meet his family and see lauren! and meet his asshole friends and drink beers with them, and im excited to sleep next to him and make him do things for me and do things for him! im just excited. so excited. ❤ baby.
im dont for tonight. ill do more tmrw.
Mar
17
wish i was not drunk and could compose my thoughts. the only thing i feel is hurt.
Mar
09
I was at Target today. I saw bathing suits. I am not eating until summer…
Okay, fine. ill still eat but im all done with the candy, to be more specific. Gummy bears and those giant sweet tarts. And diet pepsi. I have been occasionally enjoying one every now and then but not anymore. I cant say that i have been eating badly, but i cant say that i have been eating like i used to. That is about to stop. now.
more water, no more sugar (candy), no more carbonated beverages (diet pepsi), no more white foods, no more dairy (only skim milk and fat free cheese), no more eating after 8pm, and back to the gym.
I have court tomorrow. and this might be the last court date i have, but i think i still might have one more after this. Im not sure, guess that is why i pay a lawyer to tell me these things. Basically, as i understand it. Im going to be entering a guilty plea in hope of a light sentence. No jail time and minimum probation. But i guess because i blew so high and and it was considered an “accident” we really cant make an offer for a lesser charge. I pray to god that everything works out. Im trying to stay positive about this entire thing but its hard. Im scared, and nervous and i just wish it would all go away. I bet if i had a million dollars i could make it all go away. i hate money.
Tomorrow at 7am i also will be registering for a full time semester of school in the summer. 12 credits. but the way i look at it is im going to need to keep myself out of trouble for the summer if im going to be on probation. esp if its the kinda probation where you have to take breathalyzers when they call your color or number or whatever and however that works. the only thing that could go wrong with that is my grants wont transfer in time for the summer semester, which could happen, but then ill juts go the next semester. either way im going back to school. Because im cool.
Im really happy with the relationship i have. I love you. thank you for putting up with me while i deal with this fucking mess i call my life at the moment. it will get easier. ❤
Feb
19
i wish i had a friend and a boyfriend who would update their blogs as much as i do…
JUSSSSSSSSAAAYIIIINNNN GUYS…
Steffi Belle's Blog 